Dude Rates Movies

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The Warriors
6
Walter Hill (1979)
Michael Beck, James Remar, Dorsey Wright
Sunday 19 January 2014 AD

No comment

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Captain Phillips
9
Paul Greengrass (2013)
Tom Hanks, Barkhad Abdi, Barkhad Abdirahman
Saturday 18 January 2014 AD

No comment

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Like Father, Like Son
8
Soshite chichi ni naru
Hirokazu Koreeda (2013)
Masaharu Fukuyama, Machiko Ono, Yôko Maki
Saturday 18 January 2014 AD

No comment

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Gravity
9
Alfonso Cuarón (2013)
Sandra Bullock, George Clooney, Ed Harris
Saturday 11 January 2014 AD

This movie will be criticized for its scientific inaccuracies, because its action is so tangible it doesn’t even play in the same ballpark than any other science-fiction movie. It measures itself not against the laws of plausibility, but directly against those of physics. Even if at times it has difficulties winning this fight, especially when it comes to the first law of Newton near parachutes, it still stands up solidly and settles the deal with a masterful depiction of what spacewalks feel like as well as an intensively suspenseful narration.

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The Wolf of Wall Street
9
Martin Scorsese (2013)
Leonardo DiCaprio, Jonah Hill, Margot Robbie
Saturday 11 January 2014 AD

No comment

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Comment j'ai détesté les maths
8
Olivier Peyon (2013)
Eitan Grinspun
Tuesday 7 January 2014 AD

No comment

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Spring Breakers
5
Harmony Korine (2012)
Vanessa Hudgens, Selena Gomez, Ashley Benson
Saturday 4 January 2014 AD

No comment

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The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
8
Ben Stiller (2013)
Ben Stiller, Kristen Wiig, Jon Daly
Saturday 4 January 2014 AD

No comment

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Bachelorette
5
Leslye Headland (2012)
Kirsten Dunst, Isla Fisher, Lizzy Caplan
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Don Jon
2
Joseph Gordon-Levitt (2013)
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Scarlett Johansson, Julianne Moore
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Eyes Wide Shut
7
Stanley Kubrick (1999)
Tom Cruise, Nicole Kidman, Todd Field
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Iron Man
8
Jon Favreau (2008)
Robert Downey Jr., Gwyneth Paltrow, Terrence Howard
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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King Kong
9
Peter Jackson (2005)
Naomi Watts, Jack Black, Adrien Brody
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Lilo & Stitch
7
Dean DeBlois, Chris Sanders (2002)
Daveigh Chase, Chris Sanders, Tia Carrere
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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One Deadly Summer
5
L'été meurtrier
Jean Becker (1983)
Isabelle Adjani, Alain Souchon, Suzanne Flon
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Only God Forgives
5
Nicolas Winding Refn (2013)
Ryan Gosling, Kristin Scott Thomas, Vithaya Pansringarm
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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The Bling Ring
7
Sofia Coppola (2013)
Katie Chang, Israel Broussard, Emma Watson
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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The Place Beyond the Pines
7
Derek Cianfrance (2012)
Ryan Gosling, Bradley Cooper, Eva Mendes
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Troy
8
Wolfgang Petersen (2004)
Brad Pitt, Eric Bana, Orlando Bloom
Monday 30 December 2013 AD

No comment

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The Spectacular Now
9
James Ponsoldt (2013)
Miles Teller, Shailene Woodley, Kyle Chandler
Thursday 26 December 2013 AD

No comment

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Man of Steel
5
Zack Snyder (2013)
Henry Cavill, Amy Adams, Michael Shannon
Friday 1 November 2013 AD

No comment

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Halloween
9
John Carpenter (1978)
Donald Pleasence, Jamie Lee Curtis, Tony Moran
Wednesday 30 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Martyrs
4
Pascal Laugier (2008)
Morjana Alaoui, Mylène Jampanoï, Catherine Bégin
Wednesday 30 October 2013 AD

No comment

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A Little Princess
7
Alfonso Cuarón (1995)
Liesel Matthews, Eleanor Bron, Liam Cunningham
Saturday 26 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
6
Tim Burton (2005)
Johnny Depp, Freddie Highmore, David Kelly
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
7
Stanley Kubrick (1964)
Peter Sellers, George C. Scott, Sterling Hayden
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Fantastic Four
4
Tim Story (2005)
Ioan Gruffudd, Michael Chiklis, Chris Evans
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Ice Age
8
Chris Wedge, Carlos Saldanha (2002)
Denis Leary, John Leguizamo, Ray Romano
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Jackie Brown
7
Quentin Tarantino (1997)
Pam Grier, Samuel L. Jackson, Robert Forster
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Meet the Parents
7
Jay Roach (2000)
Ben Stiller, Robert De Niro, Teri Polo
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Men in Black II
4
Barry Sonnenfeld (2002)
Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Rip Torn
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Platoon
6
Oliver Stone (1986)
Charlie Sheen, Tom Berenger, Willem Dafoe
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Rise of the Planet of the Apes
5
Rupert Wyatt (2011)
James Franco, Andy Serkis, Freida Pinto
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Shrek 2
6
Andrew Adamson, Kelly Asbury, Conrad Vernon (2004)
Mike Myers, Eddie Murphy, Cameron Diaz
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Sleepy Hollow
4
Tim Burton (1999)
Johnny Depp, Christina Ricci, Miranda Richardson
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

No comment

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read mini-review
The Tree of Life
9
Terrence Malick (2011)
Brad Pitt, Sean Penn, Jessica Chastain
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

I love it until I fall asleep around the 90th minute.

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read mini-review
Transformers
8
Michael Bay (2007)
Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel
Sunday 13 October 2013 AD

I distinctly remember the day when I went to watch this movie on the theater when I was a teenager. By mixing a spielbergian tale of a teenager meeting alien bots with the alluring presence of Megan Fox, Michael Bay blew 14-years-old me away, and put a wide smile on my face. This movie, which even under the adult eye stays a decent entertainment, holds a special place in my heart. It certainly is one of the greatest cinematographic experience of my life, when adjusted for intellectual inflation.

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Django Unchained
6
Quentin Tarantino (2012)
Jamie Foxx, Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio
Friday 11 October 2013 AD

No comment

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Rust and Bone
8
De rouille et d'os
Jacques Audiard (2012)
Marion Cotillard, Matthias Schoenaerts, Armand Verdure
Friday 11 October 2013 AD

No comment

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read mini-review
Avatar
8
James Cameron (2009)
Sam Worthington, Zoe Saldana, Sigourney Weaver
Saturday 7 September 2013 AD

“It’s visually outstanding, but the screenplay definitely lacks depth.” People who try to appear smart by reviewing this movie like that are so annoying. They then proceed to say, even more annoyingly so, “Well, it’s mostly a plagia of Pocahontas and Dance with Wolves.” Can’t you enjoy a good classic adventure instead of trying to be a smartass?

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1941
5
Steven Spielberg (1979)
John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, Treat Williams
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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A.I. Artificial Intelligence
6
Artificial Intelligence: AI
Steven Spielberg (2001)
Haley Joel Osment, Jude Law, Frances O'Connor
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Boogie Nights
9
Paul Thomas Anderson (1997)
Mark Wahlberg, Julianne Moore, Burt Reynolds
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Breathless
5
À bout de souffle
Jean-Luc Godard (1960)
Jean-Paul Belmondo, Jean Seberg, Daniel Boulanger
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

Jean-Paul Belmondo incarne un macho vantard désagréable au possible, un kéké par excellence. Et ça parle et ça parle sans s’arrêter. La nouvelle vague qui n’a rien à raconter, et où je m’emmerde.

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Hook
5
Steven Spielberg (1991)
Dustin Hoffman, Robin Williams, Julia Roberts
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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read mini-review
Inception
6
Christopher Nolan (2010)
Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

Christopher Nolan sets the action into dreams so that he has an excuse to show us whatever the fuck he wants. Fans will come up with all sorts of explanations to fix holes in the ambiguous axiomatic so that they can keep convincing themselves that it’s a form of highly intelligent art. I mildly enjoy the show from a perplexed eye.

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Jaws
9
Steven Spielberg (1975)
Roy Scheider, Robert Shaw, Richard Dreyfuss
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
8
Steve Barron (1990)
Judith Hoag, Elias Koteas, Josh Pais
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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The Color Purple
5
Steven Spielberg (1985)
Danny Glover, Whoopi Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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The Sugarland Express
7
Steven Spielberg (1974)
Goldie Hawn, Ben Johnson, Michael Sacks
Wednesday 14 August 2013 AD

No comment

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The Girl Next Door
6
Luke Greenfield (2004)
Emile Hirsch, Nicholas Downs, Elisha Cuthbert
Friday 9 August 2013 AD

No comment

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The Master
6
Paul Thomas Anderson (2012)
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Joaquin Phoenix, Amy Adams
Friday 9 August 2013 AD

No comment

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A Prophet
8
Un prophète
Jacques Audiard (2009)
Tahar Rahim, Niels Arestrup, Adel Bencherif
Monday 5 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Blood Diamond
4
Edward Zwick (2006)
Leonardo DiCaprio, Djimon Hounsou, Jennifer Connelly
Friday 2 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Magnolia
9
Paul Thomas Anderson (1999)
Tom Cruise, Jason Robards, Julianne Moore
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

No comment

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read mini-review
Pearl Harbor
4
Michael Bay (2001)
Ben Affleck, Kate Beckinsale, Josh Hartnett
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

Talk about the usage of music in propaganda. Take notice of Hans Zimmer’s victorious march after Ben Affleck and Josh Hartnett’s planes shoot down a few Japanese ones, followed by cheers from sailors who are in the water, that is, among some of their peers who are drowning at this very moment. That is about the ugliest, most idiotic, possible treatment of such apocalyptic war moment. This scene cuts to a scene on a Japanese ship where an officer announces to his chief that their attack is a “total success”. The dialog tells us one thing, just after the action showed us the opposite. Michael Bay apparently had no idea what the hell he was doing, apart from making sure that this thing somehow had to contain some sort of American win. The usage of the three-acts, three-hours, Titanic format, obviously couldn’t work as a platform for such retarded storytelling.

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Punch-Drunk Love
6
Paul Thomas Anderson (2002)
Adam Sandler, Emily Watson, Philip Seymour Hoffman
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Se7en
9
David Fincher (1995)
Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt, Kevin Spacey
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

No comment

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The Artist
8
Michel Hazanavicius (2011)
Jean Dujardin, Bérénice Bejo, John Goodman
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

No comment

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read mini-review
The Dark Knight Rises
6
Christopher Nolan (2012)
Christian Bale, Tom Hardy, Anne Hathaway
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

In this opus, the availability and reliability of Batman’s gadgets are artificially reduced so that the fact that he’s no better at fighting than any other random black belt from the streets (in this case, Bane) can be used as a form of dramatic tension. <spoiler>In the end, Bane is easily killed by a Batman’s gadget and the movie must awkwardly confronts the absurdity that it all could have been settled in 5 minutes at any other time</spoiler>

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There Will Be Blood
8
Paul Thomas Anderson (2007)
Daniel Day-Lewis, Paul Dano, Ciarán Hinds
Thursday 1 August 2013 AD

No comment

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Batman & Robin
3
Joel Schumacher (1997)
Arnold Schwarzenegger, George Clooney, Chris O'Donnell
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Flight
9
Robert Zemeckis (2012)
Denzel Washington, Nadine Velazquez, Don Cheadle
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Godzilla
6
Roland Emmerich (1998)
Matthew Broderick, Jean Reno, Maria Pitillo
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
6
Mike Newell (2005)
Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Ip Man
7
Yip Man
Wilson Yip (2008)
Donnie Yen, Simon Yam, Siu-Wong Fan
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Looper
5
Rian Johnson (2012)
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Bruce Willis, Emily Blunt
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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One Day
2
Lone Scherfig (2011)
Anne Hathaway, Jim Sturgess, Patricia Clarkson
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Rocky
7
John G. Avildsen (1976)
Sylvester Stallone, Talia Shire, Burt Young
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Romantics Anonymous
4
Les émotifs anonymes
Jean-Pierre Améris (2010)
Benoît Poelvoorde, Isabelle Carré, Lorella Cravotta
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Sarah's Key
8
Elle s'appelait Sarah
Gilles Paquet-Brenner (2010)
Kristin Scott Thomas, Mélusine Mayance, Niels Arestrup
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
8
Tim Burton (2007)
Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Alan Rickman
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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The Chorus
7
Les choristes
Christophe Barratier (2004)
Gérard Jugnot, François Berléand, Jean-Baptiste Maunier
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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The Help
9
Tate Taylor (2011)
Emma Stone, Viola Davis, Octavia Spencer
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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The Little Mermaid
1
Ron Clements, John Musker (1989)
Jodi Benson, Samuel E. Wright, Rene Auberjonois
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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The Machinist
6
Brad Anderson (2004)
Christian Bale, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Aitana Sánchez-Gijón
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Twilight
3
Catherine Hardwicke (2008)
Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Billy Burke
Sunday 28 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Hard Eight
5
Sydney
Paul Thomas Anderson (1996)
Philip Baker Hall, John C. Reilly, Gwyneth Paltrow
Saturday 27 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Agora
7
Alejandro Amenábar (2009)
Rachel Weisz, Max Minghella, Oscar Isaac
Thursday 25 July 2013 AD

No comment

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read mini-review
Cars 2
7
John Lasseter, Brad Lewis (2011)
Owen Wilson, Larry the Cable Guy, Michael Caine
Thursday 25 July 2013 AD

WOOSH

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Lawless
9
John Hillcoat (2012)
Tom Hardy, Shia LaBeouf, Guy Pearce
Thursday 25 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Le Dîner de Cons
6
Le dîner de cons
Francis Veber (1998)
Thierry Lhermitte, Jacques Villeret, Francis Huster
Thursday 25 July 2013 AD

Mon problème avec ce film c’est la manière dont le critère déterminant des “cons” est leur passion pour un hobby surprenant (maquettes en allumettes, boomerang, etc). On pourrait dire que ce qui en fait les cibles des moqueries ce n’est pas leur passion en elle-même mais plutôt le fait qu’ils ne parlent que de ça, mais on ne pas vraiment en être sûr puisqu’ils sont invités au dîner explicitement pour en parler et qu’on ne peut donc attendre que ça d’eux. Non seulement le film se permet la convéniance de faire coincider ce genre de passionnés avec des personnalités qui sont outre-mesure assez embrassantes, mais en plus ces passions sont explicitement utilisées à diverses reprises comme outil d’humour, selon moi de manière tout à fait déplacée. La morale du film est que les vrais cons ce sont ceux de l’autre côté de la table, donc il y a tout de même un peu de recul, mais pour moi cela retire une bonne partie de la justification du film en lui-même.

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True Grit
9
Ethan Coen, Joel Coen (2010)
Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon, Hailee Steinfeld
Thursday 25 July 2013 AD

No comment

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Mama
6
Andy Muschietti (2013)
Jessica Chastain, Nikolaj Coster-Waldau, Megan Charpentier
Friday 31 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Y Tu Mamá También
7
Y tu mamá también
Alfonso Cuarón (2001)
Maribel Verdú, Gael García Bernal, Daniel Giménez Cacho
Friday 31 May 2013 AD

No comment

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2 Fast 2 Furious
5
John Singleton (2003)
Paul Walker, Tyrese Gibson, Cole Hauser
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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21
8
Robert Luketic (2008)
Jim Sturgess, Kate Bosworth, Kevin Spacey
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Casino
7
Martin Scorsese (1995)
Robert De Niro, Sharon Stone, Joe Pesci
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Cloud Atlas
7
Tom Tykwer, Lana Wachowski, Lilly Wachowski (2012)
Tom Hanks, Halle Berry, Hugh Grant
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Crazy, Stupid, Love.
8
Glenn Ficarra, John Requa (2011)
Steve Carell, Ryan Gosling, Julianne Moore
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
8
Michel Gondry (2004)
Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet, Tom Wilkinson
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
5
David Yates (2007)
Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Hulk
7
Ang Lee (2003)
Eric Bana, Jennifer Connelly, Sam Elliott
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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I, Robot
8
Alex Proyas (2004)
Will Smith, Bridget Moynahan, Bruce Greenwood
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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L.A. Confidential
5
Curtis Hanson (1997)
Kevin Spacey, Russell Crowe, Guy Pearce
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Lincoln
6
Steven Spielberg (2012)
Daniel Day-Lewis, Sally Field, David Strathairn
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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Signs
9
M. Night Shyamalan (2002)
Mel Gibson, Joaquin Phoenix, Rory Culkin
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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The Avengers
7
Joss Whedon (2012)
Robert Downey Jr., Chris Evans, Scarlett Johansson
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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The Fast and the Furious
6
Rob Cohen (2001)
Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michelle Rodriguez
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment

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The Italian Job
7
F. Gary Gray (2003)
Donald Sutherland, Mark Wahlberg, Edward Norton
Thursday 9 May 2013 AD

No comment